Sunday, January 22, 2012

"Mom, Did you adopt kids?"

That's what Levi, our 3 year old, said after Steve and I got home from our first day of adoption training.  I guess it's not uncommon for young  biological children to think that once you say you are going to adopt that you can just go to the adoption store and come home with kids!

Our 12 hour adoption training yesterday was worthwhile.  Here is one of the funniest things I've ever heard in my life, although I realized afterward that the woman who told the story wasn't actually trying to be funny.

One couple is adopting their young nephews.  When the woman told her biological children in December that they were going to adopt, she said that the kids said, "Can we wait until after Christmas?"  Apparently they were doing the math and realized that gift funds may have to be divided by 4 rather than by 2.  She said she was so sad, and thought, "Didn't I raise you right?"  So she replied, "You know, I would hope that if something happened to your dad and I that someone would take you before Christmas,"  and she kind of sighed and rolled her eyes in frustration.  I never laughed so hard in my life.  I think her facial expressions and demeanor really added to the hilarity. 

Her kids now can't wait to get their new brothers.

This week we have our home visit where a case worker interviews our family.  Next Saturday we complete our training after one more 12 hour class. 

Then the waiting begins. 

When the agency finds kids who meet our criteria, they will ask us if we want them to submit our home study to the Child Protective Service's (CPS) case worker.  The CPS case worker usually considers his/her favorite three families for these children.  The CPS worker is trying to make the best match with families and kids.  So, even if we are interested in adopting certain kids, the caseworker decides who is the best match for those kids.  It could take awhile to be chosen.  The fewer parameters you have, the more likely/quickly you usually get kids.

We are looking for a sibling group with kids from ages 4-15.  We've been told that it is best not to adopt children older than your oldest child.  If you do, your biological first born would no longer be the first born.  

Most people want young children and/or babies. 

I met a woman there who has 5 biological children and her and her husband want to adopt young children.  They homeschool 4 of their children and the 5th just graduated from homeschool highschool.  Their youngest child is 10 years old.  I said that I thought it would really hard to homeschool and have younger kids too.  She said they've had 3 sets of foster kids and she didn't really find it difficult to continue to homeschool...although school may end up consisting of math one day and reading the next.  Non-homeschoolers may gasp at that thought.  But, in reality that's probably not too big of a deal to have abbreviated school for a season.  If the kids "miss" some academics for  a few months, they may still have years to "catch up".  Really, since they are homeschooled they can often get things done much quicker that at an institution where they may have to wait for age-mates. 

Maybe I'll talk about age-mates vs. class-mates in another post.....

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